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Posted in Just for Laughs.

A Must Read for Golfers

Dear Friends,
 
I have written a book and am quite proud of the results. In order to market the publication, I'm asking friends and family to spread the news about this essential read for golfers.
 
This book on golf gives the reader valuable playing tips and insider information that I have gained through my 51+ years of golfing experience (I was born when my Mother paused briefly during a round).
 
Hit the golf ballHighlights  include:
Chapter  1)  How to  Properly Line Up Your Fourth Putt
Chapter  2) How to Hit a Srixon ball from the Rough When You Just Hit a Titleist from the Tee
Chapter 3)  How to Get More Distance off the Shank
Chapter 4)  When to Give the Greenkeeper the Finger
Chapter 5)  Proper Excuses for Drinking Beer Before 9:00 am.
Chapter 6)  How to Find That Ball That Everyone Else Saw Go in the Water
Chapter 7)  How to Relax When You Are Hitting Three off the Tee
Chapter 8)  How to Relax When You Are Hitting Five off the Tee           
Chapter 9)   When to Suggest Major Swing Corrections to Your Opponent and not forgetting...
Chapter 10) How to help your opponent find his ball when you are standing on it
 
The  book also includes some GOLF TERMINOLOGY
  • A Paris Hilton - an expensive hole
  • A Rock Hudson - thought it was straight, but it wasn't
  • An  Adolf Hitler - two shots in the bunker
  • An OJ Simpson - got away with it
  • A Princess Grace - should have taken a driver
  • A Princess Di - shouldn't have taken a driver

(I'm afraid I don't know the original source so credit to anon)

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